1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
