so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I want to be your penis for a week.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
