ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
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