And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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