O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize