so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
