So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
