hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
