connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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