Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
