only if we run a train.
done.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
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