Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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