Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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