it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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