Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Randomize
