i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
