and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
We have started to decorate penises.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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