Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Pants are for mortals
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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