he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Randomize
