nut hugger
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
So much rum. So many feels.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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