i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
