Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Randomize