nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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