She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
that's an acceptable place to lick
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Randomize
