Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
