pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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