He disabled his match.com account in front of me
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
My breasts were aching with rage.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize