And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Randomize
