So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
