Acid is not a monday night drug
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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