Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
