My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
