She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
