Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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