I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Gay?
German.
Pity.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
