Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Randomize
