I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
