So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Randomize
