I am in a vortex of obligation.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
