My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Drake has all the answers
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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