i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Randomize