Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
high people should be assigned attendants
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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