yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
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