She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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