You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
