If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
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