i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Randomize
