I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
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