therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize