You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Randomize
